
Dear Wyclef,
I was just flipping channels and saw that you are thinking about running for president of Haiti. Are you fucking serious? This move would make Lauryn Hill’s mental state look like Bill ‘fucking’ Gates! Since when was it not enough to just make hit fucking records? Now you have to be a fucking president? You think you’re ‘helping’ the people but clearly you were born out of incest because your thoughts are fucking retarded. Are you going to make more money as a hip hop legend or as the president of Haiti? That should be a rhetorical question, at this point. Make your millions and use that money to help the people… all the people. Being president would only hinder your philanthropy. You don’t see Bono pulling this shit… and he’s a way bigger douche bag than you’ll ever be. So take a tip from U2′s questionably heterosexual frontman and just be a rockstar that gives back to the people. However, if you ever start wearing eyeliner and shitty purple sunglasses I’ll come find you and slap the shit out of you for completely ruining my memory of the Fugees. You’re our my last hope!
Sincerely,
Hustle Womens



Say it ain’t so L.T. After hearing about Lawrence Taylor’s arrest on suspicion of rape, I was left hoping it wasn’t true. History has proved some similar claims false… but not all of them. However, it must be remembered that you can only be famous for so long before someone accuses you of rape. It happens to the best of them. Tyson, Kobe, Roman Polanski, Michael Jackson, Kareem Abdul Jabbar (formerly of Lou Alcinder fame), Big Ben, and now Taylor. I know what you are saying, ‘didn’t Polanski admit it?’ Yes he did but that’s not the point. The point is that he had to be accused first. You may also be asking ‘when did Kareem Abdul Jabbar go through this?’ Well, he didn’t but doesn’t he look like a guy that this could have happened to and some people would have believed he did it? The answer is yes. The bottom line is this only happens to people who look like, or act like, they might be willing to take some ass through force. Taylor definitely looks the part with that high fade/flat-top hybrid that he wore in his playing days and would probably countinue to wear if his age allowed it, and with the single, long, gold, cross earring hanging off his left ear. He also acts the part with his crack smoking and uncomfortably energetic personality (which may be a byproduct of the crack smoking). With all that said, I hope it’s not true.

















